I can

Blog Week

This is the start of the 2015 Diabetes Blog week, and this is my first of seven posts. Some of you may not be following #DBLOG week so let me start with a simple explanation. Bloggers from around the Diabetic Online Community (DOC) are sharing the seven blogs in seven days about common topics. If last year is any indication we will end up with around 600 blogs on seven topics. If you are interested in joining please stop over to Bitter~Sweet and follow the very careful instructions provided by Karen for how to join up. If you do not have a place to blog and wish to join us leave me a comment and I will make room on RADiabetes.com. (I always have room for the aspiring blogger). If you want to read some wonderful blogs look around the DOC, they are everywhere this week.

Today’s topic is ‘I Can’

The blog topic asks that I consider the things diabetes has not prevented me from doing. I could say the trite answer that diabetes has never prevented me from doing anything and for the most part that would be true. I mean sure, there are some things I cannot in good concise do, like travel to the South Pole, or drive cross country by myself, even though people with diabetes do these things, I know in my heart I cannot. There are other things I cannot legally do. Fly an airplane or drive a school bus are two of them, but I do not want to do those things anyway, so if I do not want to do them am I really prevented from doing them? I think not. Instead for today I want to focus on two things I never thought I would do (but knew I could) the day I was diagnosed.

Getting Married up

The first thing is be married. I know it sounds strange for a male to say he was upset that he might never get married. But it was true. The day I was diagnosed, in addition to being very hungry, I also was concerned I would never ever get married. I honestly thought who will want me around now? Let’s face it in 1974 diabetes was a terrible disease. I saw it with my own two eyes and one of my first thoughts was well there goes that. Diabetes didn’t stop me at all. In fact it may have allowed me to find the love of my life and get married sooner.

Within six months of my diagnosis I met my future wife Sheryl, and three years post diagnosis we were married. To me on June 21, 1974 that seemed as farfetched a tale as could be spun. Today I look back on that feeling and think wow how dumb was that? Sheryl and I will be married 38 years this June 3 and I will celebrate my 41st diabirthday June 21. Yes in hindsight it was a most irrational fear for a 17 year old male to have. Still I had it and today as I write this I celebrate that I found my wife and that we found a way to make it. When asked, Sheryl says it takes work to make it as a married couple. I agree with her sort of. You see it takes triple work for a couple to make it when one of the partners has chronic illness let alone two or three. I am truly blessed that my wife took the risk and married me in spite of what I thought was a condition no one would ever be able to tolerate.

Sons

Which naturally leads to the second thing I thought and this one was a stronger held belief. I will never have children. In fact Sheryl and I had to resolve this matter before we could get married. When we started talking about getting married I had to tell Sheryl I could not risk bringing children into the world who might someday have diabetes. Again it was 1974 and the idea of a child with type 1 was so ugly one could not honestly get married without this sort of discussion.

Moms and dads of type 1’s are the true inspiration of the diabetic community. I see what they have to go through in order to care for their children, but in 1974, it was (if one can believe this) maybe worse. Today we want a child’s A1C to be around 6 to 6.5 and that is deemed an acceptable risk for a child. Meaning their blood sugar is not too low to create lows or too high to cause significant damage. It is a tight rope of unbelievable balance to keep a child in that range.

In 1977 when we were married there was no A1C, no home glucose test, and no pumps. If you were a child with type 1, the regiment was hard and fast with little give. You took a predetermined amount of insulin, ate to match it and hoped things worked out. So yes having children in 1979 (when our first son was born) and 1982 (when our second son was born) was a big risk. But it was risk that Sheryl was willing to take.

When I was diagnosed in 1974 I felt the hope of someday having children was over. Today I have 2 wonderful sons, 3 grandchildren and I am a better man and husband because they taught me so much. So in answer to the question. Yes I can get married, and yes I can have children oh and while it was not my decision, yes I do have grandchildren. Give me half a second someday and I will tell you all about our sons and grandchildren.

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Other ‘I Can’ Blogs

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