Welcome to Planet Diabetes

Reprinted from TUDiabetes.org December 14, 2015

Welcome to Planet Diabetes.  This is the 4^th planet of the 5^th solar system of the 10^th ring of the Health Galaxy.  It is well populated.  Planet diabetes is a bit strange.  Things happen here that are not observed elsewhere in Health Galaxy.  These oddities make our observations particularly difficult to understand.

Consider yourself a visitor here.  However like the California hotel you can check out but you can never leave.   The truth is that once you visit here you are always a member.  Sure you may have more or less need of the oddities you will see based on surgery or life style, but no matter planet diabetes is always open and welcomes new visitors daily.  No one ever ends their excursion, though they often try to leave, it seems even the most radical departure plan is truncated by biological imperatives.   (Earthlings are so funny) So let’s take a tour.

Area Cure

Here you will find area cure.  Ahh we here on planet diabetes enjoy this area.  It represents the abundance of fake cures posted on what you humans call an internet. These are ever popular and include but are not limited to:

Those cures claiming to take care of your diabetes in 30 days or less, this one is a hoot.  The most fun is that these cures never really tell you what they entail or how they cure diabetes.  Also if you look really hard you cannot find the scientific data supporting the ‘cure’.  We love these cure plans.  Woot woot, we get plenty of visitors after folks try these.  We call this the gateway to the planet.

Honey, is a perpetual favorite.  All natural really plays well in your universe.

Cinnamon, oh my goodness have you seen those crazy videos?  We love them.  We suggest your planet keep them coming. Darn we can never get enough of that stuff.

A new favorite is Kale.  This one has real potential we need some more Kale commercials to really fill our video vaults.  We have a big Kale commercial gathering initiative here.

Online pharmacy drugs are even better than cure claims.  My goodness those are a hoot.  No one says we do not have a good sense of humor here on planet diabetes

 Well lets move on while we still have time

Area 2

Over here on the right is Area Type 2.  This part of the planet is fantastic.  You will notice we added on two years ago to handle the current and future influx of visitors.  We have a big wonderful visitor center over there paid for by your planets drug companies.  Do not mind the advertising, it is a public service.

Also check out the magnificent new drug hallway.  We have it all:

The Actos wing, Metformin concourse, and Avandia hall are very popular.  But, and this is exciting, be sure and check out the brand new Bydureon, Farxiga, Onglyza, and Victoza wings.  Wow these are some nice buildings.  We are expecting the building of many more wings.  It is going to be exceptionally nice.

We have this wonderful new fast track program.  Once the companies on planet earth decide to market one of our discoveries the building boom just goes wild.  It is so wonderful.  We expect all marble and limestone facades. It is the most exciting place on Planet diabetes.

Type 1 park

Over here is the type 1 park.  We call this the land of perpetual hope.  Ahh these fine people never leave the planet diabetes.  We even let them build condominiums here.   They hang out and bask in the sun of the coast.  It is a fantastic place.  Last week fourteen long term residents left for planet surgery.  However, as we say at one point or another they will return.  Did I mention the hotel California?

New device and drug area

Over here we have the new drug and device area.  This is where we try out new things that might be approved on your planet.  However, this area moves much slower than the rest of planet diabetes.  Many of you might remember the 5 year cure?  Well here it is.  You see each year in the new device and drug area counts as 100 years on your earth.  So when we told people on earth it would take five years to cure diabetes, we meant planet diabetes years.  It has been 3 months here in the new device area since we first told people on earth it would take five years.  Silly earthlings never listen.  We said 5 years and they heard 5 earth years.  How funny.  We meant 5 planet diabetes years.  It is the relativity thing that caused the confusion.  LOL  You earthlings are so silly.

End of the tour

Well that is the end of our tour; enjoy the rest of your stay on planet diabetes.  The next shuttle out is never.  Hahahasha fooled you didn’t I?  LOL You can check out but you can never leave, I love that song.

-30-

rick

Reprinted from TUDiabetes.org December 14, 2015